Allynjapitana’s Blog

“Will you sleep with me?” The question was too bad to be true.  What??????  Did I hear it right?  It was asked in jest but I never felt humiliated like this in my whole life.  The culprit was in his 20’s, I guess.  He knew I was a foreigner although I conversed with him and his friends in Khmer.  The gang spoke in English and Khmer with me, with the Khmer spoken slowly, teasingly.  With the way they spoke, they were taking me as someone who does not understand Khmer quite well.

It was already 9:20p.m.  I left the workplace late because my American boss was leaving the following day.  At the last minute, I called my husband and asked him to pick me up because there was probably no public transportation available and it might not be that safe.  I was wearing a collared, ¾-sleeved floral blue blouse and a pair of loose jeans, carrying a North Face backpack.

So that Husband does not have to go down Wat Dambok Kpuah street, I decided to walk up and wait for him at the corner of the main road.  When I reached the corner, there was a group of bystanders chatting together, around 5-6, some teenagers, some in their 20’s.  And right next to where we were was a restaurant-by-day-beer garden-by-night hangout spot.  The streetlights were bright and I felt safe enough especially because this was the corner street of my office.  My second rationale was that I’d been in Cambodia almost 10 years. I speak the language and know my way around.

Suddenly a car made a quick turn at the intersection that almost hit the motor taxi parked at the corner.  I snapped, “Luen meh!” (rough translation for this is “why so fast?”).  Then, one of the boys said something.  I didn’t understand him at first and I think the gang immediately decided on their minds that I was not Cambodian.  Then one boy tried to explain it to me in broken English, speaking in a mocking tone.  I got it.  They were relating that earlier, one car hit a motorbike and the car driver gave 500 riels ($0.12) and a written note saying “somtoh” (meaning, sorry) to his victim and sped away.

I tried to be friendly.  I asked one of the boys where he lives and he pointed at his house right at his back.  Then all the others laughed.  One of them replied in broken English.  I reacted, “Cheh Ongley tiet” (you know some English too).  Then I asked the boy on my left about his year level in school.

Husband seemed to have taken a long time.  I craned my neck looking out for a blue helmet.  From time to time I would look at my office street to check if he was there.  I did not tell him I would wait on the main street and I did not have my phone with me (forgot it at home while hurrying up in the morning).

Then, one of the older boys blurted the question, “Will you sleep with me?”  What?!^?! My! I could not believe my ears!  I think in my mind I denied that that was what he said.  He said that jokingly but I was never treated that way in my whole life!  I think I showed him my wedding ring and asked him if he knows what the ring meant.  Thoughts raced through my mind.  I was tempted to give him a jab, an uppercut or maybe a Manny Pacquiao combination punch.  Huh!  But what could it do?  I’m not Manny Pacquiao and I was surrounded by these men. Another option I entertained was to brag at him, “Hey boy, didn’t you know I am now DIRECTOR of an international NGO?  Show me some respect!”  But then again, it would be mere foolishness to him.  I also thought about divulging my age, saying, “Kid, you may think I am as young as you but I will soon be forty-two!  I’m old enough to be your mom!” But being the ‘kind’ girl that I am, I did not do any of the above options.

Then he professed to be a Christian.  Oh-oh, a Christian who smelled alcohol.  “You say you are a Christian but you drink,” I stated.  He rebutted, “God is not concerned if we drink or not.  There is no Bible verse against drinking wine.  Tell me a verse in the Bible that proves so.”  I reasoned, “Yeah, drinking per se is not sin but God commanded us NOT to get drunk. How many times have you read the Bible from cover to cover?” 

Then Husband arrived.  One of them said, “This is her husband.”  As I hopped onto our motorbike, the same ill-mannered Cambodian said, “Next time,…” alluding to his earlier rude remark.  Arrrrrgh!!!  I could only clench my fist and bite my teeth.

Questions:  Could a real Christian do such a thing?  Or say such a thing?

If I did box him, would I mar my testimony as a Christian?  If Jesus were in my place, what would He do?

To avoid or better prepare myself for this situation, I learned that next time:

1)      I will not let my director keep me that late.

2)     I will ask a male chaperone from the Bible school to wait with me, if any of them is available.  If not, I will wait inside the office compound.  If the people in the compound are already sleeping, I should sleep in my mosquito-infested office.

3)     I will not depend on my language skills or my age for leverage.

4)     I will enroll in martial arts.

And in case I get into the same situation,

5)     I will keep my mouth shut, eyes down and better yet, keep them behind my back. 

Any suggestions, anyone?